Friday, January 7, 2011

How to lose weight

what works, what doesn't work, and my day in a weight loss chat room

How to lose weight? I'll answer that question for you now simply and easily with just four words, that everybody can understand, even if you know anything about weight loss.

The main thing in this room weight loss that caught my attention was that each comes from time to time, and someone would say they lost weight. Everyone else in the room then I commend you for losing weight and in the next 5 seconds, would everyone in the room all the person asking a question at a time.... "How did you lose it???" Frankly, I think the question to be fun. I can not understand how someone can ask this question. Someone loses weight and you ask them how they lost that weight? What kind of stupid question is that? To me that question is just as funny as if someone said "I just got a haircut" and someone asks them "Really? How did your hair get cut off?" The obvious answer is "With scissors." And the answer to the question "how did you lose weight" is just as simple and as obvious as that... and that is why I find it so funny.

You see, despite the hopes and dreams of many people are lazy, there is only one way to lose weight. No, that wasn't a typo. Only you can lose weight in a way for one thing. Here it comes, will have the pads and pens and write. Here are those 4 simple words that I mentioned before, here is how weight loss happens. …

If you want to lose weight, you need to "eat right and workout." There you have it ladies and gentlemen, the 4 simple words. Good exercise and eat! This is it! That's all working! EVERYTHING else is USELESS! If weight loss and losing weight is your goal, then you just need to eat right and workout and THAT'S IT!!!!

When people ask the "how did you lose weight" question, it's like they are expecting to hear something other then "I ate right and worked out," but you will NEVER EVER hear any other answer to that question. I mean honestly, when these people ask that question to someone, do they really expect them to say "Well, I bought one of those electronic ab belts 3 weeks ago and LOOK AT ME NOW!!" Hell no, you will never hear that! Do you think someone is going to answer them with "I went to the supplement store and bought these amazing fat burning pills to help me lose weight and I lost it all in no time. The pills did all the work for me!" You will never hear that either! The only answer that they will ever hear is that this person lost weight by eating right and working out. Do you know why that is the only answer they will ever hear? It's because that is the ONLY thing that works. There are no weight loss secrets, no machines with super powers, and no magical pills, products or supplements.

Another thing that I found so funny in this room was how these people, who all claim they want to lose weight, will try just about anything (no matter how stupid) as long as it doesn't require them to eat 100% correctly, workout correctly and do all of the hard work that is needed in order for weight loss to happen. One of the many stupid conversations that I saw in this weight loss room was something about some type of herbal tea that is supposed to allow your body to burn 4% more calories than it normally does. At this point I had to grab my chair to stop myself from jumping out of my window. Are you kidding me? The person who started this magic tea conversation also mentioned that they had about 60 pounds to lose. If you have 60 pounds to lose and you're wasting your time talking about drinking magic herbal tea because it is supposed to allow you to burn 4% more calories, then you might as well start eating herbal potato chips and herbal Mcdonalds cheese burgers because you are herbally out of your mind.

But wait, there's more! The next wonderful weight loss conversation that started was about how you should drink cold water instead of warm water because the colder water requires your body to warm it up, and this "warming" of the water burns calories, which will of course make you lose weight. I swear I'm not making this up! First of all.. who the hell is drinking warm water in the first place? Secondly, do you honestly think that the calories that "supposedly" get "burned" while your body is "warming" up this water is going to make any difference what so ever in terms of weight loss? OF COURSE NOT! Not one single little bit! This conversation proved 2 things to me. One, that people will try anything to lose weight as long as it doesn't require them to work hard. And two, that I could start the "eating snow diet" and tell people that all they need to do is move somewhere where it snows a lot and just start eating snow 5 times a day, and they will lose weight because their body will be "warming" the snow all day long.

Don't just think I sat there and watched this, I jumped right in to tell them how wrong they were and how they should be focusing on just eating right and working out, not on useless crap like herbal tea and cold water and other little weight loss tips they read about or heard about that won't make one damn difference. The only tip there is when it comes to how to lose weight, and the only tip that will make a difference, is to just eat right and workout. They refused to listen to me though. At one point, I just came out and said these exact words: "Weight loss is SIMPLE" and half the room sounded like they wanted to fight me. They refused to believe that it was simple. Crazy huh? It took me a few minutes, but I figured out why they didn't want to believe me. These people obviously have not lost weight yet. Therefore, they want to believe that weight loss is confusing, hard and impossible. If they believed it was simple, they would hate themselves for not being able to do something that was simple. They'd much rather believe that they can't do something that is extremely complicated. Sometimes I think people would much rather just have a good excuse for not being able to lose weight, than to actually lose it. So, after a few minutes of wasted time arguing, I wished them all good luck with their herbal tea and cold water and left.

A few days later I went back in. This time the conversation was about gimmick diets (or fad diets), and I mean EVERY gimmick diet. Everything from the weight watchers diet plan, to atkins, to slimfast, to stuff I could swear these people had to be making up on the spot, like the "cabbage soup diet." This was really the conversation that just made me mad. To me, the worst part was how after someone mentioned one of these diets, everyone else would say something like "yeah, I tried that one, it was ok" or "I tried that one for a while" or something along those lines. This means that basically all of these people have "tried" all of these different diets at some point to lose weight. What I can't understand is how they could just "try" a diet. How can you expect the diet to work if you just "try" it? These people go on one of these diets for a week, come into this stupid chat room or read some stupid magazine or see some stupid commercial for some other diet and they say to themselves, wow this one looks like the best weight loss program of all, I'm going to "try" this one! DEAR GOD HELP ME! You can not "TRY" diets!!! You have to "DO" diets!!! Do it and keep doing it! That's it! And if these people were just "trying" the diets to see which one would better fit their lifestyle or to see which was easier for them, it would be fine. But no, they "try" them to see which one will allow them to lose 20 pounds in a week. They fail to understand that unless they are on the "cut your left leg off diet," these results can NOT happen EVER. Weight loss takes hard work and consistency! Sadly for these people, these were 2 things they did not want to "try."

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